Masters of Ourselves

"Make us masters of ourselves," wrote the prison reformer Sir Alexander Paterson, "that we may be the servants of others."

We have to talk about self-discipline again. We keep coming back to that, and we'll keep coming back to it as long as we live, whatever struggles we have to endure. "Does the road wind uphill all the way?" asks Christina Rosetti's poem, and the answer is, "Yes, to the very end."

No woman who has not learned to master herself can be trusted to submit willingly to her husband. And that word willingly means that she does not merely resign herself to something she cannot avoid. It means that by an act of her own will she gives herself. With gladness she submits because she understands that voluntary submission is her very strength. Because it is the thing asked of her by her Creator, it is the thing which assures her of fulfillment. It is the task assigned her which, willingly performed, actually strengthens the husband in his weakness.

The husband strengthens the wife in her weakness by obeying the command to command. But he, too, must first have mastered himself. George MacDonald points out that the strong-willed one is not the willful one. A willful child wants only his own way. His will has never been exercised against himself. The strong-willed person wills against himself, chooses that which he does not naturally choose. Many men protest that it is not their nature to dominate. Many see their wives as superior to them in intelligence, strength of character, physical endurance, or spiritual perception, and use this as an excuse to let them lead. But the roles are not assigned on the basis of capability. Thy were determined at the beginning of Creation to be a man's role and a woman's role and again, we are not free to experiment, tamper with, or exchange them.

It takes self-discipline and it takes humility to do your job. We can count on the God who issued the order to provide the strength to carry it out. No man has sufficient strength in himself properly to be the head of his wife. No woman can rightly submit to his headship. It takes grace, and grace is a gift, but we are to use the means of grace. Self-discipline helps. Prayer helps. Christ, who is the Head of all of us, stands ready to help any man or woman who asks Him.

~Elisabeth Elliot from Let Me Be A Woman

Cutting Edge

When Jack's five month birthday rolled around I began to look for teeth. Joel and James both got their first bottom two teeth when they were five months old and I expected Jack would too. That month came and went with no bottom teeth. I thought it was curious, especially since he was acting like he was teething. His sleep was disruptive, he was gnawing on his fingers, the drool was pouring out of his mouth. One day I was letting him gnaw on one of my fingers, and he immediately pulled it towards he back of his mouth and I felt something sharp. The poor baby had cut a top molar, and the second one came right after it. So Jack has two top molars but still no other teeth.

Inspiration

Beatrice has inspired me by her post of her Favorite Things. I am changing up my blog a bit and adding my favorite things to it. Hope everyone enjoys it, especially Queen Shenaynay.

He's mobile

During the first week of June, Jack began doing the "forward flop". He is now making his way quite easily across the living room floor and delighting us all.

the butcher, the baker, the candlestick maker

Our little Jack began to clap today! I was holding him while assisting James, but I could see Jack's reflection in a mirror. He began to laugh and clap at James (who, when Jack sees him coming begins to laugh). I am so glad that I got to see his first clap! I think if it hadn't been for that mirror, I would've thought that he was still waving his hands up and down instead of bringing them together. So, another milestone passed today.

Ol' Mr. James . . . well, he's growing up. He's in perpetual motion, and in a perpetual growth spurt; now wearing size 10 shoes, and 3T and 4T clothes. He can't wait until his birthday so that he can be important and have his portrait taken, too. He instantly underwent Middle-Child Syndrome when Jack was born. It is a continual challenge for me to make sure I am connected to each of the boys, but especially James. He loves his brothers, and is Mr. Assertive and Mr. Instigator. One of his favorite things is hearing me say that something is "James' business" and not anyone else's. Now that'll make his day! He has recently showed a marked improvement in his drawing/coloring. He will color one object on a coloring page and although he doesn't stay in the lines, he doesn't go very far out of them either. He also has started drawing circles very well, triangles sometimes, and also he will marker or pencil lines as it were to fill in something. It ends up making a rectangular shape. Anyway, Joel did that when he was younger as well; basically, you can just tell that he is controlling his drawing utensil well. It's exciting to see. Pretty soon he will be counting to 100 by 10s and reading. Everything that Joel does he wants to do, whether or not he should (he doesn't stop to think that), and he is more times than not successful at what he sets out to do. He has great determination, which is wonderful. I know it will serve him well in his life. Quirky bit: James has begun to eat left-handed.

Joel began tying his shoes earlier this year, actually before his fifth birthday. It was quite a pleasant surprise for us, and what a big help it is for him to be able to do it! He's also taking showers, setting the table and sweeping. I'm so glad to have such a good helper. His jobs are changing a little bit so that James can have his own jobs and learn to work as well. Joel is a very nurturing older brother (except when he is not! ;) ). He enjoys "teaching" his brothers to read or some other thing that he hasn't quite mastered himself. It usually is well received and actually helps improve his own skills.

not one little bit

Jack is six months old today. He rolled from his back to his belly two weeks ago! Today I fed him a few bites of avacado. He is was so happy for the first 4-5 bites. He wasn't even thrusting his tongue out. It was as if he had eaten many times before. I was thinking, "oh, my wonderful, amazing child!!" Then the picture-perfect scene changed dramatically. Jack began to be very upset with his avacado. He began to grunt and fuss and cry and spit it out! He looked like he was spitting out a cherry pit. He was very precise about it. I believe he removed every bit of avacado from his mouth and did not swallow another bite.

Hidden Potential

Today I put Jack down on the floor for some play time. I placed him on his belly, and he immediately rolled over. I sighed, happily and proudly, then put Jack back on his belly. He had a grand time playing on his belly, and actually almost started turning himself in a circular motion to be able to see what he was trying to look at. He never got tired or laid his head down. I picked him up for a minute or two to give him a break, and put him down again. He rolled over again! So it definitely wasn't a one-time thing. He can really do it! Yeah, Jack! Now I just have to keep myself from overprotecting him, and let him get down on the floor and do his thing! I mean, we've got to get practice in for his 3 month portraits!

Favorite Things

Joel's choice word of late is "mongoose".

My favorite mispronunciations of James' at present are:

bithdee potty (birthday party)
poopted
berry coot (very cute)

All About Jack

Jack is eight weeks old now. In two days he will be two months old! He is such a good baby! He is pretty close to sleeping through the night. He sleeps from about 9pm to 4am on average. The 4am is sometimes 3am, but a couple of times it has been 4:30 or 4:45. He also naps well during the day, usually 2 hours at a time. He loves his bouncy seat. Today he was just kicking away (it looked more like stomping), and making the seat just bounce and the toys swing. He also loves the swing. He watches the mobile quite intently while the swing swings and the music plays. It is a good place for him to sit in the filtered sun coming through the glass door in the living room. I try not to put him in these seats too often, but it is nice to know that he does enjoy being there when I need him to be there. And there are times when I do need him to be in one of those seats! However, they are not safe havens for him. Any time he is not in my arms or in his bed I must keep an eagle eye on him to protect him from the big brothers. They would quite smother him with kisses and hugs, and James would try to give him fives and head butt him. Lest I forget, here are his weights and lengths that I have recorded.



Two weeks: 9 lbs. 1/2 oz.

Four weeks: 10 lbs. 2 oz.

Six weeks: 11 lbs. 3 oz., 23 inches

Eight weeks: 11 lbs. 15 oz.

Mama Takes the Cheese

The other day at lunch, Daddy grated the precious last bit of our cheese onto my food while Joel and James gazed on longingly. While Daddy was doing this he was telling Joel and James about how wonderful Mama is, how we love her so much, and all of the things she does for us and how hard she works; how we must treat her so well and do special things for her. Just what a good Daddy should be telling his sons! After a few moments Joel said, "and we give her cheese, too."

Remember doing this?

It has begun. While driving down our street, I could just barely hear Joel saying to himself, "has leaves, doesn't have leaves, doesn't have leaves, has leaves, doesn't have leaves, has leaves, has leaves...."

The Season of Fall(ing)

James seems to just fall over himself continually. Tripping, slipping, not looking where he's going; these are defining parts of James' little home life. And people wonder how a 2-year-old could have subluxation in his spine.... Well, during the Thanksgiving holiday at Opa's & Oma's, he took his grandest fall yet. He fell backwards out of a barstool. It was sort of a complicated fall which I did not witness, but the details that mattered were that he fell from the barstool backwards while he was sitting, and on his way down hit another chair, and ended up on the floor with the barstool on top of him. His entire backside had bruises and bumps, from his bottom up to his head. The main injury, however, was his left shoulder which really hurt him. It was one of the situations that Jason has always told me to "get ready for" and "get used to". But I don't know if I'll ever be "prepared" to see my children in pain. Thankfully we had two doctors on hand: Daddy and Aunt Jeana. Their assesment of the "patient" put everyone's minds at ease, although it didn't make James feel much better. Poor James. He is doing much better now, thankfully, and I am perhaps a little more experienced at this thing called mothering boys.

Contradiction (Pooh speak for Introduction)

He has 10 toes . . .

. . . it's Jack!

Play Ball!

One positive attribute that comes along with James' affinity for the wilder side of life is his athletic ability in playing ball. The football, in particular, is one of his favorite things to play with; he says, "can ye pay catch??" He has no fear of the ball coming for him, and catches it amazingly well. He is catching it from 10-12 feet away now. The ball can hit him right in the face without the slightest wince from him. Only once or twice has he ever given a scowl or unpleasant look about the impact. His ability to throw is not as great as his ability to catch, but it has improved dramatically in the past month. I used to pretty much never be able to catch anything he threw to me, but now his aim is much better - you just need to be about 3-4 away from him. His advancement in this area has given he and Joel a real game to play. It isn't always a very long game of "catch", but as each of them improve their skills, I think it will just get better and better.

Just for You

This book came to mind a few weeks ago - cannot remember the circumstances which brought it to mind, but it had to do with the lawn mowing page in this book. I told Jason about it, and how much it reminded me of Joel; how he tries so hard to do special things for his mother, but they just don't always work out right. I couldn't remember the name of the book or the author, but while at the Library this week they actually had this book on display and the cover was something that I could never forget! Of course I snatched it right up! James and Joel both love it, although Joel is really into more advanced books. He understands the sentiment of it, though, and I like to think he appreciates it.

It is fun to see which books the boys tend towards. Right now James loves Eric Carle, and the two Golden Books he received for his birthday, "Scuffy the Tug Boat" and "The Happy Man and His Dump Truck". Those are basically the only books he requests to read, but happily sits down to any story. "Stone Soup" is a new one for him to enjoy. Also, he calls Jemima Puddle-Duck, "Jemima Puppy-Duck". One of the current favorites, for both boys, is "Jack the Giant Killer" which is way better than any Jack and the Beanstalk tale I've ever heard. James walks around saying, "Fe Fo Fum ... man ... bake my bread!" Joel is very much into Fairy Tales. He likes all of them; Cinderella, Beauty and the Beast, Rumpelstiltskin, Hop O' My Thumb. He also loves anything Mother Goose. If you tell him it's Mother Goose or a Fairy Tale, he is sure to be excited about it.

Joel is doing well with his learning to read. He likes to try to sound things out more and more. He is really solid now on his short and long vowel sounds; a little bored with them, I think. About two weeks ago in the middle of playing, he sounded out the word "cans" on the toy he was playing with. He just decided to do it all by himself. I was so excited to see him do that! He is excited now about learning to read, and learning about the letters. The blending of the letter sounds together is something he understands now, which was a big step. He will also pick out letter sounds in the words that I am reading or saying to him, and try to figure out which letters are in a particular word because he recognizes the sound. I love seeing the desire to learn in his eyes.

I Winned!

For all of Joel's tenderheartedness and gentleness with his little brother, James is aggressive and conniving back. No thankfulness on his part yet for a nurturing elder sibling. This upsets Joel to no end, and he has no idea how to handle these "situations" or "rows" or ... fights. If James takes something away from him, Joel doesn't want to go get it back. James is more than half his size and strong. It's never easy to go up against him on anything. So one day when James had sent Joel into a crying fit, I explained to Joel how James doesn't care about this or that, he just wants to see what Joel will do about it. It's all about power and not about substance with him. So I told Joel if he wanted to win, he must be strong on the inside and not be a bad boy and throw a fit. If he throws a fit, then James has won, but if he doesn't throw a fit, then he has won. Later that afternoon I heard some growling cries coming from the playroom. It was Joel. A few minutes later I heard James crying. Upon investigation, Joel came running up to me saying, "Mama, James hit me with --- and took ---, and I hit him back and he gave me back my --- and I winned!"

And so it was Mama who learned a lesson that day, and not Joel. At least, he didn't understand the lesson that I tried to teach him. We had to talk about not hitting each other for quite a while after that. But this episode did teach Joel to stand up for himself a little better, and that's a good thing.

The Delaware-Lackawanna Railroad

You learn something new every day, and this time the lesson came from a CD of Mother Goose songs. For those of you who have enjoyed or suffered through hearing Joel's and James' "Puff and Toot" CD and, along with Jason and me, were puzzled by the song "Where Do You Work, John?" you now know that John works on the Delaware-Lackawanna Railroad.

Restaurant

Yesterday afternoon the boys took their hot pink frisbees, piled rocks in them, and called it "chicken" and "pie". Joel set up chairs for their "restaurant", which according to him was a no-shoes restaurant. They just sat there and pretended to eat for quite some time. One would think that they were really and truly hungry, but they were rather upset to have to come inside to eat their real supper. Apparently the way this food looked to them in their imaginations was much more exciting and appetising than what I had prepared for them....

Repertoire

I'd better make a list of all the songs that James can sing. Jason was also able to sing songs very well at an early age (18 months), and James certainly has that trait as well. There are songs that I am not even aware that he knows, and he will just be singing them away one day and I'll think to myself, "when did he learn that one??"



Hymns:

Standing on the Promises

I Love Jesus

Brethren We Have Met to Worship

Marching to Zion

Sweet Bye and Bye

Buy the Truth



Other songs:

All 8 songs on our Mother Goose CD, including:

I've Been Working on the Railroad

Down by the Station

Where Do You Work, John?

Happy are the People

Be Ye Kind (also his first Bible memory verse!)

Clap Your Hands

Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star

This Little Light of Mine

The Measure of Their Stature

Jason has a very nice posture grid at work; it's so easy to measure the boy's height on it!!! James is 2' 8", Joel is 3' 3-1/2".

We have joined the Summer Reading Club at the Library. If the boys each read 20 hours or more before the end of July, they each receive a free ticket to the Circus (yes, the Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus!). So we are reading away. Right now Joel and I are reading Winnie the Pooh, with others mixed in, of course. James loves our Raggedy Ann Book, and Goodnight Gorilla. These aren't very long, but we have been reading them almost daily along with others. He's doing pretty good, and this is a good opportunity for him to learn to sit and have story time. He'll sit down with a book on his own just fine, but when he has to sit and listen it's not as enjoyable for him at this point. His already (somewhat) impressive vocabulary is growing by leaps and bounds now. Words like "soldier" and "Pollyanna" just pop out of his mouth and that's fun to hear!

James' favorite shoes, his crocs, are already too small for him. His feet are growing so quickly right now! It's a little sad too, because he is so proud of those little shoes. We bought him some flip flops and he does like them, too, or is adjusting pretty well. He didn't want to have anything to do with flip flops until Joel was wearing flip flops again this spring. Yet, the crocs were still his favorite, with boots a close second. Perhaps we'll get him some boots for his birthday since his favorite pair have been retired.